Item 1. Nothing just happens. I stopped believing in coincidences a long time ago when coincidences proved to be a connection. I wrote an investigative theory about it in my first textbook called Criminal Investigation: Forming Reasonable Grounds. In a nutshell, the theory is about perspective and opening your eyes. If you immediately dismiss an event as a coincidence, youâ€™ll miss the connection. If you immediately classify something that happens as a coincidence, youâ€™re closing your eyes tight about the connections that led to the event. Youâ€™ll never solve that specific mystery. In other words, youâ€™ll miss the point of what just happened, a point that could have been the turning point. Youâ€™ll have missed the real eye-opener.
Nothing just happens. I donâ€™t believe that we randomly meet people. I stopped believing in random meetings that just happen for no reason. The reason is evidence. Every turning point in my life happened by meeting someone who gave me an opportunity, who taught me a lesson, who pointed me in a direction. I believe itâ€™s a two-way street. Not only are people sent into our lives to send us messages, we are sent into other peoplesâ€™ lives to send them messages. A complex but simple messaging center. Itâ€™s up to the receiver to not drop the message. Donâ€™t delete the message until you get the point. Save the message in a safe place. And donâ€™t mess around with messages.
The problem with messages is two opposing teams â€“ good and evil. One leads, the other misleads. Figuring out what team the messenger is from isnâ€™t easy. It takes next-level investigative skills. Thereâ€™s a lot at stake so getting it right is the difference between the right direction and wrong direction. Investigating the source of the message depends on evaluating credibility. I wrote a theory of how to evaluate credibility in my Criminal Investigation: Forming Reasonable Grounds textbook. I use it in every aspect of my life. Itâ€™s a 10-point â€˜how-toâ€™ list but the starting point is the most important â€“ never give instant credibility. Ever. Prove it. Donâ€™t just hand over a high credibility rating without supporting evidence or youâ€™ll be disappointed. Even heart-broken.
When I screw up the messages, things get screwed up. When I ignore message or listen to the wrong one, things go side-ways. Donâ€™t let this happen to you. Donâ€™t ignore messages and donâ€™t listen to the wrong ones. Follow the right messages. Sounds easy but it isnï¿½ï¿½t. Itâ€™s easier said than done.
Item 2. The events of the past 4 days have been life-changers. On Saturday, I gave my third and final Father-of-the-Bride speech. Three days before, I had no clue what to say. None. But I searched and found the answer. I was on fire. Epic speech. I could do this for a living for nervous FOTBs who fear public speaking. It was an unscripted 20-minute Father-of-the-Bride speech that got an off-the-charts approval rating. Hereâ€™s my point. This isnâ€™t self-promotional. Itâ€™s a message. The search for the right words were life-changing for a number of reasons. The biggest reason was clarity. My first two FOTB speeches were big hits. But this was a masterpiece. The reason was that this time I had less bullshit clogging my brain. I started a mental detox three years ago by becoming a full-time business owner and writer. I sliced my mind-fat percentage down to single digits. Accumulated bullshit turns to fat. Waste mismanagement. If your waste management system isnâ€™t firing on all cylinders, youâ€™ll suffered cognitive constipation.
Saturdayâ€™s FOTB speech was the equivalent of the Beatles playing at Shea Stadium. The ‘Hard Dayâ€™s Night’ and ‘Hey Jude’ of FOTB speeches. The truth is that my FOTB speech opened my eyes. It was another life-changer. Itâ€™s too long of a story but you can read between the lines why.
On Monday night, I was a guest on a TV program called â€œHealth Mattersâ€ hosted by Dr. Lana Marconi at the Rogers TV studio in Brampton. Another epic event. We were both on fire. We connected. We hit it off. We talked about working out. Dr. Marconi is a true pro. Donâ€™t be surprised if you see her on national TV soon. Don’t be surprised if she becomes Canadaâ€™s Oprah. Too bad it was only a one-hour program. It was real talk â€“ blunt talk. No bullshit. Itâ€™ll be on Youtube soon and on Dr. Marconiâ€™s website at http://www.drlana.com/TV.html
On Tuesday I was a guest on Velocity Training BlogTalk Radio hosted by Layla Starchild, from Vancouver. The topic was the positives and negatives of sports. Epic dialogue. We were both on fire. We connected. We hit it off. Layla is a true pro. Donâ€™t be surprised if she becomes a national talk show star. Hereâ€™s the link to the free podcast: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/velocity-athletic-training/2013/05/07/youth-in-athletic-activities
Last night I went to football practice. Epic 2-hours of hard work. No team, nowhere would have ripped out more reps in 120 minutes. Guaranteed. Hereâ€™s the only problem â€“ thereâ€™s a lot of bullshit that has to be lifted to build a football team. Tons and tons of accumulated bullshit. My speech at the end of practice was epic. The theme was team suffering. The reason I love working out is that I have no team to rely on. I donâ€™t have to get let down by others failing to appear. I donâ€™t have to suffer from no back-up â€“ my team not showing up for practice or showing up on a play when help is needed. Teams are different. Youâ€™re at the mercy of an entire group. Team suffering happens when the 100%-100% ratio doesnâ€™t happen – when 100% of the team is not 100% committed. Expecting to win a championship ring when less than 100% of the team is less than 100% committed is another definition of insanity.
Itâ€™s amazing what can happen when you reduce mind-fat. Cutting bullshit from your mind takes some heavy lifting but you have to dig in and keep lifting. Nothing just happens. Open your eyes and your heart to what happens. Life is truly amazing. One of my favourite quotes is Psalm 116 â€“ â€œHow can I give back to the Lord for all the blessings Heâ€™s poured out on me?â€ You can hear it in the epic U2 live version of Stay + Bad + 40 + Where the Streets Have No Name (Elevation 2001: Live from Boston). Itâ€™s on my workout Ipod. I suggest you put it on yours. If it doesnâ€™t lift you to lift more, go for a check-up. Hereâ€™s the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-MS6kZ8u0zY
Gino Arcaro M.Ed., B.Sc., NCCP Level 3
owner â€“ X Fitness Inc.
head coach â€“ Oakville Longhorns football team
author â€“ Soul of a Lifter